It has been a lot of fun lately listening to you learn new words and sounds each day. You are really picking them up fast and you'll be talking before I know it. It's amazing really.
It's also amazing how long you can talk to someone and never really talk to them.
While most men will discuss an endless list of weather, sports, movies, food, women, petty complaints, ect: Will you dare to be a man who isn't afraid of the important issues? People's hearts, dreams and core beliefs are an infinitely more interesting topic.
Banter has it's place, and you can learn from it at times. But don't let your words stop there. You may get some funny looks at first, because Americans aren't use to talking about real things. But just wait, the awkwardness turns to authenticity. The hesitancy turns to openess.
Ask more questions than you answer, listen more than you speak, and invest yourself into the conversation. And don't be afraid to say what you mean. This will lead to true friendships, real relationships, and a much richer life.
I would guess that a lot of fathers and sons struggle with getting past the small talk. Let's make it a point to really, truly talk to each other.
Friday, August 19, 2011
Lift their heads
People seem to live up to expectations, or conversely, live down to expectations.
What I mean by this is that if someone hears their entire life that they are great at something, they work hard at that thing to really be great.
However, if someone is told their whole life that they aren't worth much, that they'll never amount to anything, that even if they try, it's no use; well then, they have a very good chance of letting that sink into them and dictate the course of life. You can see this with both individuals and whole people groups who are told they aren't worth as much as their fellow man. It's hard to get that message out of your head.
The reason I bring this up is to let you know that your words will have power, and that you can use them to build people up, or tear them down. Think of the impact you can have on somebody's life if you look them in the eyes and tell them they are worth more than they know.
Look for opportunities to do this. Be a friend to the friendless, a encourager to the discouraged. Don't live your life grasping for someone's hand more powerful than you. Live your life reaching down to pull others up.
What I mean by this is that if someone hears their entire life that they are great at something, they work hard at that thing to really be great.
However, if someone is told their whole life that they aren't worth much, that they'll never amount to anything, that even if they try, it's no use; well then, they have a very good chance of letting that sink into them and dictate the course of life. You can see this with both individuals and whole people groups who are told they aren't worth as much as their fellow man. It's hard to get that message out of your head.
The reason I bring this up is to let you know that your words will have power, and that you can use them to build people up, or tear them down. Think of the impact you can have on somebody's life if you look them in the eyes and tell them they are worth more than they know.
Look for opportunities to do this. Be a friend to the friendless, a encourager to the discouraged. Don't live your life grasping for someone's hand more powerful than you. Live your life reaching down to pull others up.
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
A Man's Honor
I was recently told of a fellow golfer who is quite skilled, but is known to be a cheater. He'll nudge things back inbounds, he won't count all of his strokes, he'll do what he has to in order to win. And because of this, he is talked about behind his back. He is laughed at and scoffed.
I want you to know that it is far more important to keep your honor among men than it is to beat them at a game. If men can trust you they will respect you. Your word is a most valuable thing.
If you are anything like your mother and I, you'll have a competitive edge to your personality. I'm sure we'll play many games together over the years, and there will be part of you that wants so desperately to win that you will think about lying, sneaking, cheating. I recommend you don't do it. The win will never feel good to you if you know you went about it the wrong way. It will feel cheap, and it will be cheap.
And don't be fooled into thinking winning is everything. Yes, I want you to try your hardest, to give your best. But I want it to be your honest best.
I want you to know that it is far more important to keep your honor among men than it is to beat them at a game. If men can trust you they will respect you. Your word is a most valuable thing.
If you are anything like your mother and I, you'll have a competitive edge to your personality. I'm sure we'll play many games together over the years, and there will be part of you that wants so desperately to win that you will think about lying, sneaking, cheating. I recommend you don't do it. The win will never feel good to you if you know you went about it the wrong way. It will feel cheap, and it will be cheap.
And don't be fooled into thinking winning is everything. Yes, I want you to try your hardest, to give your best. But I want it to be your honest best.
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